Here are two simple truths:
Increasing self-love helps us lose weight. Loving ourselves is the most powerful motivator for healthy weight loss. We take care of the things and the people we love.
Loving another person (romantically) increases our self-love. Everybody loves to be in love. We also want to love ourselves. The little known truth is these two loves can make dramatic contributions to each other. We might say that romantic love and self-love are soul mates. Being in love with another person can teach us a lot about loving ourselves and the quality and depth of our self-love makes all the difference in our ability to love and care for another person.
One of the reasons romantic love is so intensely wonderful is because it makes us aware of the very best parts of ourselves. When you are head over heels in love, simply being in the presence of your lover makes you love yourself more than you ever thought possible. One love nurtures and increases the other. If we pay close attention to the deep lessons in romantic love it will become an incredible source of inner healing, growth and (surprise!) motivation for weight loss.
What are the “deep lessons in romantic love?”
Lesson One: The Eyes of Love
Falling in love opens our eyes more clearly than any other experience of life. It gives us the ability to see another person's astounding magnificence. Our love-eyes allow us to see what has always been present but was hidden. We, with love-eyes, look upon our lover and see her or his true beauty.
Falling in love tears away the blindfold of normal vision and graces us with the ability to see the lover as the masterpiece of art that they actually are and always have been. One blessed look and we are changed forever.
Who and what we see suddenly becomes almost divine, and being with that person assumes a quality much like worship. Falling in love brings new sight that each of us is an astounding work of art, a masterpiece beyond compare.
Yet we live our lives sadly unaware of our magnificence until for a brief and blessed time some previously ordinary individual is given the eyes to see who we truly are. And miracle of miracles, we are given the same eyes through which to return the favor.
How does this miracle occur?
I think of it as grace and that grace is poured out on all humanity and even the lowliest among us can feel the cleansing balm that opens our eyes to something only God usually sees.
The first good news is that falling in love comes to many, if not most of us.
The second good news is that it always brings the gift of the Eyes of Love.
The third good news is that it does not have to end.
Sadly, many would say, "But this wonderful phase never lasts. It always dissipates in the harsh light of reality and we go back to the regular difficulties of relationship."
It is true; most couples lose touch with this very special experience in less than 12 months.
BUT, not because it is a drug that wears off. It wears off because the once blessed and happy couple has no idea about how to sustain it – and they even expect it to go away. This occurs when the eyes of love begin to go blind because neither partner knows what to do to recover their precious love sight.
If you are willing to put aside your cynicism and your long-held belief that love always crashes down into the hard realities of life, I will tell you how this wonder can be sustained.
But, not now – this is enough for today.
The how-to-sustain-the-eyes-of-love articles will be coming soon.
Matthew Anderson, D.Min. is a nationally recognized weight loss coach, columnist, motivational speaker and author of The Prayer Diet, Eating to Kill, and Why You Want to Be Fat. He also specializes in helping individuals survive and thrive during major life crises and can be contacted at www.DraUSA.com or (561) 362-4049.